After a month hiatus, I return. So much to write about, so little time. I completed my first morning run. Its bad enough to be taking all this time out of my evenings to train, but to actually wake up abnormally early to run at the crack of dawn, with cool breezes, and a rising sun, is ludicrous. Now granted the conditions are fantastic, but that nauseous feeling that one gets early in the morning does not naturally dissipate as you are pushing yourself in Central Park. Seriously, the active peristalsis from the late night pizza counter acts the rising acid. I knew pizza had its pros!!!
Hill Sprints!! Ill say it again Hill Sprints!!! Who in their right mind voluntarily sprints up steep hills? Who in their right mind sprints? But sprinting up hills….have you seen the hills on the upper loop of central park? YIKES!!!! Well I asked who is crazy enough…I am!! Thanks to some running partnership with the Kenyan elites (aka CR). I eagerly await the sounds of "watch the tram car please" in hopes for a ride to the top. But superathletes do these things and that is why I trek the mountain...that is why we keep on truckin!
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Friday, July 13, 2007
Despite All My Rage I Am Still Just A Rat In A Cage
Sun-Tzu said “All warfare is based on deception. There is no place where espionage is not used.” There is no safe place in the war of man vs. beast. For those of you who are squeamish skip to the next blog. For those who are brave…I salute you. It was not long ago…maybe a few nights ago, that my most vicious battle was fought. After a cross training effort playing softball in the North Meadow I traveled to the 97th street exit on the west side. Along with my soldiers in arm, we approached the gates. On any ordinary day, those gates are guarded. But on this hazy evening there was a guerrilla attack, defying the rules of man vs animal. (Have you noticed that pigeons no longer respect Man’s way and fly awfully close to you…they must be learning from the rude birds in Europe. I though we had an arrangement with such animals?)
As I led my battalion out of the gate, I heard movement beneath me. As on any normal day I figured it to be a dog. I felt the enemy rub against my ankles and looked down and jumped….Splinter had attacked. I jumped up and stepped right on the rat and it took off in fear. As the Art of War states: “Victorious warriors win first and then go to war, while defeated warriors go to war first and then seek to win” Splinter had no idea who he was up against - I am coming after you now!
But let us revisit just how gross this assault was. Recall, I have seen almost every animal in the world, have been in contact or within steps of many, yet this enormous wild rat, which clearly was on steroids, was the grossest and scariest of them all. The sheer thought of the rat hairs around my ankle causes acid reflux. My not so brave soldiers lacked the courage to wart off the beast of a rat and jumped like girls and headed for the trenches. But good thing Im in training b/c my kung fu reflexes scared the enemy attacker off. But splinter left scars – no physical blemishes but a mighty fear that the rat community will return for vengeance like Bruce Willis in Die Hard. This seriously affects my runs, as when the clock strikes 9, and the moon glows in full force, and the dark settles in, a rat can come from any corner on the bridal path, or anywhere in this city!
Why couldn’t it have been a cool animal. Like a hawk. Or maybe some game like a gorilla or a human being that would get you jacked.
I luckily went unscathed, no bite marks or slashes (thank gd) just mental scars.
These rats defied the man vs. beast agreement like the squirrel with George Costanza!
Thankfully two brave nurses in the battalion provided comfort and in depth scrutiny to see if the rat punctured my skin. Thank you first sergeant Rachel Brach and Randi Greenberg
Training was light early in the week due to the fact that I was scrubbing may ankle for days with soap and antibacterial but I pulled through at weeks end. To reward myself I ordered 3 deserts…oh boy this is getting interesting.
Stay Tuned…..
Thanks for your support!
As I led my battalion out of the gate, I heard movement beneath me. As on any normal day I figured it to be a dog. I felt the enemy rub against my ankles and looked down and jumped….Splinter had attacked. I jumped up and stepped right on the rat and it took off in fear. As the Art of War states: “Victorious warriors win first and then go to war, while defeated warriors go to war first and then seek to win” Splinter had no idea who he was up against - I am coming after you now!
But let us revisit just how gross this assault was. Recall, I have seen almost every animal in the world, have been in contact or within steps of many, yet this enormous wild rat, which clearly was on steroids, was the grossest and scariest of them all. The sheer thought of the rat hairs around my ankle causes acid reflux. My not so brave soldiers lacked the courage to wart off the beast of a rat and jumped like girls and headed for the trenches. But good thing Im in training b/c my kung fu reflexes scared the enemy attacker off. But splinter left scars – no physical blemishes but a mighty fear that the rat community will return for vengeance like Bruce Willis in Die Hard. This seriously affects my runs, as when the clock strikes 9, and the moon glows in full force, and the dark settles in, a rat can come from any corner on the bridal path, or anywhere in this city!
Why couldn’t it have been a cool animal. Like a hawk. Or maybe some game like a gorilla or a human being that would get you jacked.
I luckily went unscathed, no bite marks or slashes (thank gd) just mental scars.
These rats defied the man vs. beast agreement like the squirrel with George Costanza!
Thankfully two brave nurses in the battalion provided comfort and in depth scrutiny to see if the rat punctured my skin. Thank you first sergeant Rachel Brach and Randi Greenberg
Training was light early in the week due to the fact that I was scrubbing may ankle for days with soap and antibacterial but I pulled through at weeks end. To reward myself I ordered 3 deserts…oh boy this is getting interesting.
Stay Tuned…..
Thanks for your support!
Monday, July 9, 2007
Marc vs. Wild
Marc vs. Wild
Week 1 of “official” training is complete. To recap: I ate huge amounts at a BBQ sat on the beach, drank and sang karaoke. Some week of training....well don’t worry b/c I actually got all of my runs in!
Ok so call me Bear Grylls Lessner. I have managed to whittle shoes out of beach wood, climb a 50 ft tree with my bare hands to plot my route out in Central Park and outrun the devilish horses at 59th street. It was “unbelievably very very dangerous.” Many of you might be saying…what in the world are you speaking of Marc? Well tune into the discovery channel, pretty much any day at any hour and watch the greatest show on earth…Man vs. Wild. Then you will understand.
But as usual I digress. This week I was spotted by a fan running in Central Park with Short Shorts. But b/c the world is aware of the shorts shorts via this amazing blog, I was not embarrassed.
For those fellow runners, walkers or Central Park strollers, I feel for you. The horses have corrupted our paths. They have soiled our journey. And they have made breathing quite difficult as you loop around the southern edge of the park. Now I have been to the far ends of the Earth, I have slept in the desert, rode elephants, jumped off mountains, swam with killer penguins, walked with lions….I have seen the Berlin wall be knocked down…but nothing in my training or journeys have led me to the stale pungent odor of hot horse “crap” brewing in the sun. My olfactory’s are in pain…and that is not a normal running injury. I contacted my coach and described the burning sensation felt in my nostrils as I loop past these horses and unfortunately they were perplexed on a treatment for what they coined “Runner’s Olifactoritous.” I call on you to help me overcome this horrendous beast and urge you to come down to the anti horse feces rally being held this Sunday in front of Trump Plaza.
Honestly – when we were rolling in Africa and there were elephant droppings (more like tree trunks) everywhere, I coped. This is a new breed and many believe is the marc’s kryptonite. But as it goes, I will survive and channel that stench as motivation. Rocky climbed the stairs, Ghengis Kahn defeated millions, William Wallace invaded London, General Maximus Decimus Meridius dominated the Coliseum and I will overcome the horrific brown mile at southern central park!!
In other news, this blog has been cited and received awards on dontbooarod.blogspot.com. Your continued support is amazing!
Week 1 of “official” training is complete. To recap: I ate huge amounts at a BBQ sat on the beach, drank and sang karaoke. Some week of training....well don’t worry b/c I actually got all of my runs in!
Ok so call me Bear Grylls Lessner. I have managed to whittle shoes out of beach wood, climb a 50 ft tree with my bare hands to plot my route out in Central Park and outrun the devilish horses at 59th street. It was “unbelievably very very dangerous.” Many of you might be saying…what in the world are you speaking of Marc? Well tune into the discovery channel, pretty much any day at any hour and watch the greatest show on earth…Man vs. Wild. Then you will understand.
But as usual I digress. This week I was spotted by a fan running in Central Park with Short Shorts. But b/c the world is aware of the shorts shorts via this amazing blog, I was not embarrassed.
For those fellow runners, walkers or Central Park strollers, I feel for you. The horses have corrupted our paths. They have soiled our journey. And they have made breathing quite difficult as you loop around the southern edge of the park. Now I have been to the far ends of the Earth, I have slept in the desert, rode elephants, jumped off mountains, swam with killer penguins, walked with lions….I have seen the Berlin wall be knocked down…but nothing in my training or journeys have led me to the stale pungent odor of hot horse “crap” brewing in the sun. My olfactory’s are in pain…and that is not a normal running injury. I contacted my coach and described the burning sensation felt in my nostrils as I loop past these horses and unfortunately they were perplexed on a treatment for what they coined “Runner’s Olifactoritous.” I call on you to help me overcome this horrendous beast and urge you to come down to the anti horse feces rally being held this Sunday in front of Trump Plaza.
Honestly – when we were rolling in Africa and there were elephant droppings (more like tree trunks) everywhere, I coped. This is a new breed and many believe is the marc’s kryptonite. But as it goes, I will survive and channel that stench as motivation. Rocky climbed the stairs, Ghengis Kahn defeated millions, William Wallace invaded London, General Maximus Decimus Meridius dominated the Coliseum and I will overcome the horrific brown mile at southern central park!!
In other news, this blog has been cited and received awards on dontbooarod.blogspot.com. Your continued support is amazing!
Thursday, July 5, 2007
Who likes Short Shorts?
Firstly, I'd like to welcome you to this blog. I recently decided to embark on training for the ING NYC Marathon...that's 26.2 miles. Driving 26 miles is a lot, I can't imagine running it...but I will. My first order of business when i embarked on this mission was to purchase the proper gear. Now I'm sure you have seen people in full out running gear..and laughed...I sure as hell did. Despite that I needed to see what the hype of those Short Shorts were. I didn't want to start with mid short shorts i wanted to go right into it. I purchased my first pair and noticed a mesh lining inside. Looked more like a bathing suit. Apparently runners do not wear underwear...seems a bit nuts to me (no pun intended). After washing the shorts 30 times (jk) I rocked those short shorts like JT rocks your body. Not only that - I put those bad boys on with no undies and boy was it a liberating feeling. I mocked it all these years but think I would create work pants like this. So much support yet so comfortable. Please be sure to buy such khakis when I release them to the market, they are in trial stage right now.
But I digress...the bottom line was that these shorts were so short, that if I didn't have the lining it would be like a tripod. I think you could see my butt cheek as I was running. I took one look in the mirror and laughed for hours. I should have taken photos, but did not want them to come back and haunt me when I run for president one day. Imagine me in those with two thumbs up on the cover of Newsweek...actually that would be a great campaign.
After hours of laughing I embarked on a run and ran like I have never run before. The mobility and freedom of my legs were ridiculous.
Lesson learned....Short Shorts may be good for a laugh...or two ...or three but they are unbelievably comfortable and great for running.
But I digress...the bottom line was that these shorts were so short, that if I didn't have the lining it would be like a tripod. I think you could see my butt cheek as I was running. I took one look in the mirror and laughed for hours. I should have taken photos, but did not want them to come back and haunt me when I run for president one day. Imagine me in those with two thumbs up on the cover of Newsweek...actually that would be a great campaign.
After hours of laughing I embarked on a run and ran like I have never run before. The mobility and freedom of my legs were ridiculous.
Lesson learned....Short Shorts may be good for a laugh...or two ...or three but they are unbelievably comfortable and great for running.
FOOD is the devil
Its is exactly 4 months prior to race day...July 4th and while I should be in training I decide to eat more hot dogs than Kobeyashi and more burgers than Chestnut could ever eat. I am so full I cannot move. Despite this I will prevail. 26 miles is nothing when I have more protein and carbs than a chipotle burrito in me.
Ride Sally Ride
Welcome....I have never done this before but have been inspired by dontbooarod blog by the lyrical genius and TV icon. You may recognize me from TV shows such as Romper Room and Chain Reaction....or you may not because no one watches Chain Reaction...it is the worst show on TV, so bad that i could not even watch myself on it.
But I digress...as you will often find going forward. Welcome to my blog dedicated to tracking the highlights of my training for the ING NYC Marathon. You will be with me from start to finish. While that sounds boring, I assure you I will make it comical. So comical that you will not be able to sleep at night because all you can think about is when I will post my next blog! Well don't stop believing because it will be weekly (or as as my schedule sees fit).
In all seriousness I have embarked on this mission to raise money for pediatric ailments and will be running for the Children's Hospital of Boston. I hope you can help me raise money and help fight pediatric/infant heart conditions.
Be sure to come out and root me on on November 4th, yes clear your calendars now!!!!
But I digress...as you will often find going forward. Welcome to my blog dedicated to tracking the highlights of my training for the ING NYC Marathon. You will be with me from start to finish. While that sounds boring, I assure you I will make it comical. So comical that you will not be able to sleep at night because all you can think about is when I will post my next blog! Well don't stop believing because it will be weekly (or as as my schedule sees fit).
In all seriousness I have embarked on this mission to raise money for pediatric ailments and will be running for the Children's Hospital of Boston. I hope you can help me raise money and help fight pediatric/infant heart conditions.
Be sure to come out and root me on on November 4th, yes clear your calendars now!!!!
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